• Home
  • About
  • Contact
Friday, April 20, 2018
No Result
View All Result
Allen Dew
  • Lifestyle
  • Career
  • Family
  • Travels
  • Politics
  • Religion
  • Sports
  • Others
  • Lifestyle
  • Career
  • Family
  • Travels
  • Politics
  • Religion
  • Sports
  • Others
No Result
View All Result
Allen Dew
No Result
View All Result
Home Lifestyle

Being Aware of Awareness

by Marcus Aurelius
March 29, 2018
10
0
Being Aware of Awareness

Frustrated middle aged businessman sitting in steps

13
SHARES
Share on FacebookShare on TwitterShare to Contact

I got a WhatsApp message from Femi asking to meet to speak with me about something he said had been bothering him for a while. I immediately replied, setting up dinner the next day at one of our favourite haunts. That the double tick indicating the message had been delivered turned blue as soon as I hit send, showed me Femi was anxiously awaiting my reply. What could it be so pressing on homeboy’s mind I thought to myself?

The next day I meet Femi for dinner, the first thing he says to me is Marcus I’m experiencing an existential crisis. Don’t worry I know the Heimlich manoeuvre, I can help you dislodge the dictionary you have stuck in your throat I joked. I’m constantly worried about my future, worried about not fulfilling my potential he said, ignoring my attempt to calm him down with humour.

Now a bit of background. Femi is a very successful thirty-something year old, married for ten years to an amazing woman with whom he has four beautiful kids. Femi is a highly driven type A personality who’s only as good as his last achievement, in short, he’s a perfectionist. However, always being in service to your need to be perfect can have its dark side. For Femi, and unbeknownst to a lot of his social circle, this has expressed itself as years of continuous therapy and medication.

How is any of this news Femi? I asked. You’ve been talking to your therapist about these issues for quite a while now. This time I’m taking a different approach he replied. I want to swap medication for meditation and I know that’s your thing he said. I was quite surprised. I’d been trying unsuccessfully to get Femi to join me on the meditation cushion for years. Meditation simply means paying focused attention to a particular object in a specific way.

The object could be your breath, body sensations, particularities of your prayer ritual, etc. It trains mental attention so you can by choice disengage from negative habits of thinking and decide where to focus your attention. The technique I recommended to Femi is based on Meta-awareness which literally means awareness of awareness. Here the goal is to observe the movements of your mind as a neutral third party and not a participant caught up in the maelstrom of whatever emotion you might be experiencing in the moment.

Meta-awareness is something we’ve all experienced at one time or another. Think of it this way, do you remember a time when you were extremely upset about something your significant other said to you and wanted to react instantly? But then your rational mind made the judgement he/she didn’t really mean what he/she said and was just caught up in the moment? That judgement call is possible because of Meta-awareness. The more you practise the better you become at it.

This technique is perfectly summed up in a quote I came across a while back. “That which is aware of fear is not in itself fearful and that which is aware of anger is not in itself angry”. It has been several months now since Femi began meditating, whilst it’s not a panacea, he has made significant progress in curtailing his rumination about the future.

advertisement

We can all learn from Femi’s meditation journey. I purposely use the word journey because meditation is not a quick fix. It’s a marathon rather than a sprint. So put your running shoes on and let’s hit the road.

Share your stories on www.allendew.com; there is a real world waiting to hear your story. Send the story to info@allendew.com or admin@allendew.com

Previous Post

The Whole Truth

Next Post

When Tides Turn

Related Posts

Giving It Your All
Lifestyle

Giving It Your All

by Allen Dew
April 18, 2018
0

I used to work in Sales. I wouldn’t call myself a “guru” but I was comfortable in my roles in Sales, Marketing and Business Development. I always believe that those roles are...

Read more
The Lunch Invite
Lifestyle

The Lunch Invite

by Allen Dew
April 16, 2018
0

I once got invited to Lunch by a female colleague (senior colleague) who wanted me to feel welcomed as a new guy in a new country. For perspective sake, most people in...

Read more
Babies are Babies, Men are Men; Part 1
Lifestyle

Babies are Babies, Men are Men; Part 1

by Seyi Ogunsi
April 13, 2018
0

“Babe, are you going nuts? Slow down!” I yelled at my friend as she picked up even more speed. I gripped the dash board tightly and closed my eyes. I decided to...

Read more
Seductive or Lustful?
Lifestyle

Seductive or Lustful?

by Allen Dew
April 11, 2018
0

A friend of mine was recently asked to stop serving in a religious organization where she volunteered. She was an usher who stood in front of the congregation during regular services. Her...

Read more
Next Post
When the tides turns 1

When Tides Turn

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

No Result
View All Result



Like Us on Facebook

Categories

  • Family (2)
  • Immigration/Travels (3)
  • Lifestyle (59)
  • Others (3)
  • Politics (2)
  • Religion (7)
  • Sports (2)
  • Travel (3)

Recent.

Giving It Your All

Giving It Your All

April 18, 2018
The Lunch Invite

The Lunch Invite

April 16, 2018
Babies are Babies, Men are Men; Part 1

Babies are Babies, Men are Men; Part 1

April 13, 2018
Allen Dew

I am Allen Dew; I write "Human Stories" on Mondays. Others write Human Stories, Global Perspectives, Godly Living through-out the week.
We also aggregate Human Stories from various websites.

Tags

adultery Lust romance Stories

Subscribe to AllenDew via Email

Enter your email address to subscribe to our latest stories and posts

© 2017 AllenDew - Human Stories and Intellectual Perspectives

No Result
View All Result
  • Home
  • Lifestyle
  • Career/Education
  • Celebrity
  • Family
  • Immigration/Travels
  • Politics
  • Religion
  • Sports
  • Others
  • About Us
  • Contact

© 2017 AllenDew - Human Stories and Intellectual Perspectives

We love to send you our Newsletter!
Kindly drop your email.

SUBSCRIBE 
close-link